but they don't wear these shits where I'm from
I'm not hating, I'm just telling you
tryna let you know what the fuck that I been through
I was told today that I am narcissistic and pathetic... awesome.
I am not sure how I come off as narcissistic, but pathetic, maybe. What people say to me hurts me, and I wish that weren't true. I feel like people who don't like me say more truths than those who do, because they are trying to spare my feelers.
I do want to know more about myself from other's perspectives though. It is interesting to me that I was told those things. I had no idea. And I was pretty sure I didn't do anything to antagonize this lovely person. It was just said.
Well ANYWAYSSSSS
I planned some stuff for Scott's birthday. We aren't spending in Idaho anymore, but I figured since he is turning 21 I could have him buy some marsala wine and make him chicken marsala. That is nearly his favorite dish, but he is always down for some beef stroganoff.
I really enjoy that just by reading some shit I can magically create some edible nummies, especially if I have never made that dish before. It makes me feel ever so barely accomplished.
Oh, fun fact. I have finished my first scrapbook. I don't know if I have mentioned that before (or that I even scrapbook at all), but the first one is done. I am pretty proud of it. I would like to say it turned out well. I have started another, and I am probably about 8 pages in already. Scrapbooking is good and bad.... I should not be spending money for anything, but I really want to save these pictures and not just have them on my phone for no one to see. (Sidenote, 80 8x10s cost me only like four dollars. I have this cool FreePrints app that you just pay the shipping, so that isn't so bad.)
No money, no family.
As you can tell, I have Iggy Azalea stuck in my head. I don't know why, but I do like that song, and I am not a big rap fan. Speaking of rap, everyone here seems to listen to it at MIND BOGGLING volumes. My windows shake, and I am like 30 feet from the road. Calm down guise, you won't be able to hear soon!!
Last night there was this wicked thunderstorm. I went outside and stood in the rain until I was completely soaked through my clothes. I just sat there and enjoyed the cold rain. I was pretty cold. The rain was a bit chilly. I felt good, and I also felt like crying.
Scott has finally talked to someone about the Navy, and I guess he is getting things sorted out so that we can just go home. I pray to God that everything goes okay, and that our life will just get better. I want to feel better about something. I want to feel successful and in-charge of my life again. I want to be able to handle the stress of life without even batting a well-coated eyelash.
I like chocolate milk.
OKAY BYE
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